Why this angry communist became a Christian

I WAS a communist, a draft dodging, angry socialist who marched in the streets, protested apartheid, war and poverty and got arrested because I wanted to help bring justice to the world.

I thought if enough people felt outraged at the way things were, changes could happen. But I realised that wasn’t going to happen. Too many people were operating on greed and self interest. That was human nature.

Then I became a Christian. If I thought God didn’t care about suffering in this world, I’d be p….d off as well. But I’m not.

I’ve seen lots of injustice and it still upsets me. But I believe God suffers with us because most of the suffering is the result of our free will and our silly rape of the planet.

Jesus is the prime example of God’s love for us. A weeping, bloodied Jesus suffering for us and loving us. God is not distant.

If there is any hope in this world it lies, for me, in the forgiveness and redemption of mankind by a loving God. This world can be a terrible place as well as a beautiful one.

In the end, it’s a temporary place for all of us. I’m probably more realistic about life as I get older. It’s a hard place and the innocent suffer. But the fault is not God’s . It’s ours and I think we need to face up to that reponsibility.


28 thoughts on “Why this angry communist became a Christian

  1. I was about to say, “Good on him! I agree,” whoever this dude is, but then I realised it’s our Bryan. 😆

    If I had never personally experienced God’s forgiveness; His unfathomable love and grace, for myself, I would have opted out of this painful life a long time ago. There is no doubt that the world is full of darkened, apparently souless individuals committing selfish, horrendous crimes, but there is so much more beauty we live with, which is a reflection of God’s glory. It really does saturate the darkness around us, and not only that, but God’s presence in and through His creation renders it powerless, for if God is truly for us, then who can be against us? Some may have given up on Him, but thank God He never gives up on us.


    • I know that quote:- ” if God is truly for us, then who can be against us?”
      In any case, the answer is:- Just about EVERYBODY! (especially moslems!)
      ….and they weren’t even around when god himself (aka ‘Jesus’) got his!


    • GOD IS HOPE!

      “When you walk through a storm
      Hold your head up high
      And don’t be afraid of the dark
      At the end of the storm
      Is a golden sky
      And the sweet silver song of the lark

      Walk on through the wind
      Walk on through the rain
      Though your dreams be tossed and blown

      Walk on walk on with hope in your heart
      And you’ll never walk alone
      You’ll never walk alone”

      Romans 15:13
      Our hope comes from God. May He fill you with joy and peace because of your trust in Him. May your hope grow stronger by the power of the Holy Spirit.


  2. Pingback: Why this angry communist became a Christian | Christians Anonymous

  3. Though they get older, some people never grow up!
    But they DO give up.

    “Too many people were operating on greed and self interest.”
    may well be “human nature”, but acting on self-interest in the fighting the world’s ills
    (the “darkness” owned and operated by a god invented for the very purpose) has, along the way, some benefits for everyone and everything.
    Not so abandoning the ‘Good Fight’, and greedily seeking one’s own, exclusive, salvation at the price of letting the rest of the world go to hell…and laying it all off on the God of Expedience:- ‘Thy Will Be Done!’

    ….and the worst of it is that all of history clearly shows that the god-thing, under any brand-name, doesn’t help; in fact, it makes it worse. Almost very single time.
    It generates the ignorance and darkness; it invents ‘Evil’ by decree.

    Was it Zapata who said “It’s better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.” ?

    ‘ Forget aging and the fact that your butt is becoming more familiar with your knees than your backbone.’ ~ Pam Ayres (?)


    • I think it’s not the believers and trusters in God who are disconnected from the reality of the way things are.
      Can atheists understand the universe? We like to think of the universe as simple and comprehensible, but the universe is under no obligation to live up to our expectations.
      Scientists seem to generally believe human evolution has built a tendency towards moral behaviour into our brains.
      We are moral by nature, so evil is a deviation—perhaps a chemical imbalance.
      Yet the major religions claim sin—which can lead to evil—is something inbuilt in us.
      Countless wars and persecutions show people are capable of incredible cruelty to those outside their own tribes.
      But can we say that some people are born bad? Or are ordinary people driven to commit extraordinary and horrifying acts of genocide and murder by an outside force?
      Since the terrorist attacks around the globe, more people seem to believe evil might be more than a socialconstruct or social ideology. It might be something real.
      And within personal choice may be our capacity for good or evil.
      Edmund Burke said the only thing necessary for the triumph of evil was for good men to do nothing.
      Creation is a work in progress. Evil is not going to have the last word. God has us as God’s collaborators, fellow-workers, and ultimately those who strive for good will prevail.


      • Opening a large door with a single word.
        Are you able to say what, exactly, is delusional about my comment?

        If there are things in our world that are not ‘good’ (evil, say ~ which god brags about creating) then that needs to be recognised, excised from it’s overlapping environment, and eradicated. God won’t (as its author) eradicate it; and history has proved that ~ even should he want to ~ he can’t. It not only persists, it grows.

        What’s more, it’s not possible to eradicate it (or anything) without being prepared to fight it.
        Win, lose or draw, dropping out and refusing the challenge is not only tantamount to encouraging it, but handing that responsibility over to the god responsible for it in the first place is too daft for words.

        You’re never beaten until you give up.


      • This ‘revised’ response absolutely reeks of subjective premises/terminology (“I think”/ “moral”) , and false assumptions (“We like to think of the universe as simple and comprehensible”..) ….or should that be strawmen? Anyway, the only people I know think of the universe as being “simple and comprehensible” base their assertion on the ‘goddunnit’ hypothesis. Not unlike the ancients who thought it was ‘simply’ a matter of finding a tall-enough tree to be able to pick stars from the sky.

        And the only people I know who talk about ‘morality’ are those who are NOT talking about ‘science’ (except perhaps so-called ‘social-science).
        What “scientists seem to generally believe” ~if in fact they do (particularly in re. undefined and undefinable philosophical concepts like ‘morality’) ~ is irrelevant. And endlessly variable.
        “If it can’t be expressed in numbers it’s not science: it’s opinion”, to quote LL.

        The same sort of response applies to all those other terms: ‘cruelty’, ‘sin’, ‘evil’,’persecutions’, ‘horrifying’, ‘good’, ‘bad’,’ordinary’, ‘murder’, ‘believe’, etc. etc. etc. ALL such terms are defined by decree ~ and there’s nothing ‘scientific’ (definable and testable) about them. And worse, the ‘value’ of the decrees vary endlessly according to need. As does ‘god’.

        eg, How does one distinguish between “extraordinary and horrifying acts of genocide” and ‘boring and ordinary acts of genocide’? Or even the ‘good and lucrative acts of genocide” decreed by god? (eg the Canaanite expedition, among others)…..or even the ‘necessary and malicious acts of genocide’, like when you lay out the Ratsak, termite poison or squirt the flyspray?

        The seed for murder, mayhem and misery may always be found in comments like:- “and ultimately those who strive for good will prevail.”
        The question must always be :- Whose ‘good’? The Inquisitors were certain they were doing ‘good’ in consigning misfits to the flames to ‘save their souls’.

        But Burke’s comment makes a different point:- “…the only thing necessary for the triumph of evil was for good men to do nothing.”
        You do ‘nothing’ when you withdraw from the field of battle and flickpass the problem to ‘god’. (The one with the absolutely hopeless track-record.)

        But consider:- Despite the ravages of age, the weakening muscles, shortness of wind and disappearing of bryancells ( !! -Is god guiding my typing finger?) NOW is the perfect time to gird your loins and fight the good fight that’s stymmied god since Adam was a boy!

        Unlike god, YOU’VE got nothing to lose! 😉


      • Dabbles,

        “eg, How does one distinguish between “extraordinary and horrifying acts of genocide” and ‘boring and ordinary acts of genocide’? Or even the ‘good and lucrative acts of genocide” decreed by god? (eg the Canaanite expedition, among others)…..or even the ‘necessary and malicious acts of genocide’, like when you lay out the Ratsak, termite poison or squirt the flyspray?”

        Geez, I don’t know Dabbles, weren’t you advocating genocide on those who skin dogs alive sometime ago, despite the fact that it is part of their culture to do so?

        And aren’t you always advocating that we rise up against the government and topple it (could this be advocating genocide against public servants and politicians)?


      • Fascinating, I must say. those folk like yourself, Bryan who did a big big switcheroo after a rather fanatical early part of life.

        Maybe if in my childhood and youth, I’d been a baddie, or a passionate anarchist or Communist, instead of having a happy secure and loved early time, AND a nurtured conviction about Christianity, I might have done a similar change to you, and become a Christian.

        For me, I didnt start as a fanatic on either side, and so presumably that is why I havent finished up as any sort of fanatic now. Who knows.



      • I am prepared to acknowledge a force for evil in the world. It’s something however that I think is often best ignored, as it then loses strength. If you not only look for the good in other people, but communicate with the good side of their natures, that will strengthen. There is in each of us something of God, often pretty hard to see, but it can be uncovered.

        Instead of just fighting evil, if we look to see what caused it, and work to eradicate those causes – then it will weaken and die.

        Don’t hold your breath, though. The damage to the brains forming and developing in traumatised or malnourished children sets them up to be perpetrators in the future.


      • Y’got one right davinci!!! Praise the Lord!!

        —> “Geez, I don’t know Dabbles”


    • Some good thinking in there, Dabs. I have to think we can’t see the benefit of evil, and neither should we or we’d be inventing it!

      But like children in kindergarten, whether we are having fun or weeping our eyes out, we do not understand what lessons we are really learning.


      • I don’t know how this appeared so far from the post of Dabs June 17, 2014 at 07:06 that it’s about!


      • That’s pretty-well true Strewth. But it’s still being learnt. In a week or two those little kids will be going to Uni, into politics or strapping on weapons and vests to make and enforce whatever they picked up way back then ~ knowingly or otherwise. I’m well aware that my ‘hatred’ of bullies harks back to those days, as does my proclivity for looking up lovely lady-teachers’ skirts!
        All experience (learning) is accumulative.

        “The evil that men do lives after them,
        The good is oft interred with their bones” – Marc Antony


  4. Do atheists hate God?
    by Matt Slick

    Not to long ago, I was in an atheist chat room for about half an hour where I was repeatedly insulted, told that I was stupid, that I couldn’t think properly, mocked, cussed at, etc. It was the usual fare from the atheists. I remained calm and eventually asked the question, “Why do you atheists hate God?” I knew the question would get an interesting response. It did. Foul language, insults, lies, misrepresentations, hatred, condemnation, and more. But woven throughout the numerous insults was the most common answer: “We don’t hate what does not exist!”

    I replied by asking how they knew that God did not exist. I told them that if they could not give me some rational reason for denying his existence, then their position is held by faith. In that case, why would they condemn me for my faith in God? That, of course, did not smooth things over with the obstreperous atheists. One person said that the God of Scripture could not exist because, and I paraphrase . . . “how God set Adam and Eve up for failure, gets jealous, smites people, sends lying spirits, sends strong delusions, provides instructions for slave ownership, and Jesus told the slave to obey their slave masters.” When I asked if other atheists agreed with the sentiment (I asked several times), not a single atheist of the 30 or 40 in the room responded in the affirmative; neither did they deny it. I repeatedly asked for affirmation or denial with not a single response. Instead, for some reason they became even more agitated and vitriolic. Then, it finally occurred to me that they confirmed that they really do hate God even though they deny he exists. Let me explain.

    When you hate someone, you speak evil of him, say negative things about him, call him names, accuse him of wrongdoing, lying, etc. That is exactly what they were doing to me. So, I pointed out that they were expressing great hatred towards me. And, since verbal condemnations reveal how a person feels about someone, I pointed out to them that their same behavior aimed at God demonstrated their hatred for God because they often condemn the God of Scripture. I told them that I have visited their room many times and read and heard their numerous hate filled condemnations for the God of the Bible.

    Of course, this did not go over well with them since more insults followed.

    Now, I’m not saying every atheist does this, but I’ve noticed it is pretty common for them to say they “lack belief in God” or “don’t believe he exists” and then site Old Testament Scriptures where God does what they think is morally reprehensible (which is funny since they have no objective and absolute morals by which to make such judgments). They complain, mock, and pronounce ethical condemnation against the God of the Bible . . . just like you would do to someone you hate. Hmmm . . . So, they really do hate God.

    But I’m sure atheists would simply say they only attack the biblical concept of God. Okay, but if they are only hating a concept of what God is according to the Bible, then they are hating the God of the Bible. Simple.

    So, do atheists hate the God of Scripture? Well, according to my experience in various chat rooms on the Internet with atheists, I have to conclude that their regular condemnation of God, their accusations of his immorality, speaking evil of him, etc., clearly demonstrates that they hate God.

    Rom. 1:28-32, “And just as they did not see fit to acknowledge God any longer, God gave them over to a depraved mind, to do those things which are not proper, 29 being filled with all unrighteousness, wickedness, greed, evil; full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, malice; they are gossips, 30 slanderers, haters of God, insolent, arrogant, boastful, inventors of evil, disobedient to parents, 31 without understanding, untrustworthy, unloving, unmerciful; 32 and although they know the ordinance of God, that those who practice such things are worthy of death, they not only do the same, but also give hearty approval to those who practice them.”



    • I can see CARM doesn’t stand for ‘Cobbledegook And Rant Management’, Mon.
      For one thing they’d have to learn to spell ‘gobbledegook’ correctly; for another they’d need to grasp the reality that ‘morals/morality’ is NOT an exclusively religious concept, and godbotherers don’t have any ‘intellectual rights’ to such terms..
      Neither are ‘proper’, ‘righteous’, etc. etc.

      And at the end of the day, it’s quite legitimate for atheists to attack the ‘immorality’ of religion because religion hangs it’s entire credibility on such ‘qualities’; but ‘atheism’ does no such thing (not with any legitimacy) and therefore can’t be attacked (or compared/whatever) on the same basis.

      Bit of a free kick, certainly, but that’s life.
      Now,,,, back to the ‘atheistic’ websites you say you patronise. 😆


      • I don’t know Dabs,

        But the more I read YOUR rants about God, the more I get to thinking that it’s not all talk, or just an intellectual denial, that there is a real force (or feelings) behind your words, and it ain’t love. Yes, I know you’re a stirrer, but…….?

        Having said that though, I recall one exciting Sunday Church service standing next to a tall streak of of misery, who kept on screaming out at the top of his voice to God to go get f*****! Over and over again he’d scream, “F*** ***! Now I’ll admit that there were times when I hated God too, but they were dark times for me, and since atheists wilfully deny ‘The Light’, then it stands to reason that they are in the dark too.

        No Dabs, I believe as Matt Slick, and as the Bible states, that some atheists really do hate God.


      • No Mon, I don’t ‘hate’ god. That’d be like hating ‘0’ or ‘grrkle’.
        What does get me going is frustration at the wasted resources ‘believers’ ~ particularly the pushy wanna-be believers ~ throw away in the pursuit of their own place in the ‘heaven’ of their own fantasies.

        ……..or the other ways in which such pursuit influences what happens in the ‘here and now’.
        I’ve got a nice little dog here that was completely freaked out by a previous owner and is just, six months later, beginning to come good.
        Just last night I found myself talking to a woman who was boasting at some length about all the good things ‘her group’ was doing for variously needy people, when I discovered by accident that she was the previous owner of the dog.
        ….Long story short, ‘her group’ was a bunch of local born-againers (with, of course, their own truer-than-any-other-church church) which had certain views about the (mis) treatment of other animals ~ one of which was that they weren’t created to be inside with (special-creation) people, but were meant to ‘run free’ outside, and ‘disciplined’ (dominion-motivated) as required by god.
        (which likely accounts for the many chain-inflicted scars on the dog)

        I kept control of myself at first, and finally told her that the pooch had about recovered from her trauma and that I’d be looking to rehome her. When she learnt the dog would probably find a home in suburbia she threw an absolute fit about the cruelty of making a dog live in the suburbs and not be able to ‘run free and live in the sun and rain as god intended.
        (The stupid bitch ~ not the canine one! ~ actually demanded the dog back to save it from such mistreatment!)

        It was at about that point I gave her both barrels and there was enough “real force (or feelings) behind” my words to send her reeling. She also took it as an attack on her ‘godly position’, and suggested I was probably on my way to hell..

        Compassion is a good quality to cultivate; but never at the cost of passion.


      • ps.. ‘atheists’ who hate god are sailing under false colours.
        ….and pretty stupid to boot.


      • hm…..” Now I’ll admit that there were times when I hated God too, but they were dark times for me, and since atheists wilfully deny ‘The Light’, then it stands to reason that they are in the dark too.”

        Interesting suggestion, when you remember that god himself named Satan ‘Lucifer’ —> ‘Lightbringer’. 🙂

        Is it even conjecturally possible to be in the dark whilst in the presence of the ‘Light’??

        There’s a question for the theologists among us!
        (but I’ll bet they’ll come up with some explanation! 😆 )


  5. Yes, most of our suffering comes from our own hand. But I do believe Scripture teaches (just read it today) that God sometimes does send difficulties our way. Good post. God bless.


    • There are passages like God being the author of good and evil, and some teachings hold that the evil part is Satan’s role as God’s servant. Bad things often bring unforeseen good results.


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