Quotes you won’t find in The Good Book


OFTEN, the Bible doesn’t say what many people think it does. God works in mysterious ways.

Yes, it seems He does, but it’s not a phrase found in the Bible. It comes from an 18th-century hymn by William Cowper.

How many wise men visited the infant Jesus? Three? Possibly not. No number is given in the Bible, but three specific gifts are detailed. There’s no mention of Adam and Eve specifically eating an apple, or of Jonah being swallowed by a whale, of Mary Magdalene being a prostitute, or of Noah leading the animals on to the Ark two by two.

Jesus did not feed only 5000 with the loaves and fish. The Bible says that besides the 5000 men, there were women and children who also ate.

There is no mention anywhere in the Bible of the Seven Deadly Sins, that being good will get you into Heaven, that praying to saints will get us anywhere, that we should practise moderation in all things, that a fool and his money are soon parted, that charity begins at home or that cleanliness is next to godliness.

The words pope, Catholic, Anglican, Pentacostal and atheist appear nowhere in the Bible. Neither does the word Bible. The word Christian appears only three times.

A US survey found that 75 per cent of Americans were convinced that the phrase “God helps those who help themselves” is from the Bible. It isn’t. It is commonly attributed to Benjamin Franklin, who possibly pinched it from one of Aesop’s Fables from the 6th century BC.

Another version of the phrase, “Trust in God but tie your camel”, is attributed to Mohammed.

As a concept, it is bad theology. For one thing, it reflects a lack of compassion that can lead us to believe that those who are less fortunate have done something wrong in order to deserve a lack of compassion.


55 thoughts on “Quotes you won’t find in The Good Book

  1. Just goes to show how easily bad information can be spread, even when the majority of the population has a copy of the book that can clear the misconceptions up.


  2. Cleanliness being next to Godliness is also in the Bible. For starters consider Exodus 19:10 where people were told to wash their clothing in preparation to physically meeting with God at Sinai. Then consider that the tribe of Levi which was responsible for the sanctuary and the temple, were the closest Israel physically came in the presence of God. Consider how many times the levites and priests were required to wash, because of their position in relation to God. Then you have baptism which is a type of washing required in the New Testament as part of fellowship with God.


    • Baptism is symbolic of having our sins washed away; forgiven and forgotten forever, but as far as I am aware, one does not have to be formally baptized to be saved.


      • Nicodemus said to Him, “How can a man be born when he is old? He cannot enter a second time into his mother’s womb and be born, can he?” Jesus answered, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit he cannot enter into the kingdom of God. That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit. Do not be amazed that I said to you, ‘You must be born again.’ The wind blows where it wishes and you hear the sound of it, but do not know where it comes from and where it is going; so is everyone who is born of the Spirit.” (John 3:4–8)

        Just what exactly do you understand by the phrase “born of water” Monica?


      • This I know davinci,

        That I was saved before I was baptized.

        I was infant baptized into the Roman Catholic faith, but as an adult (still in the Catholic faith) I repented and made a public declaration that Jesus is Lord of my life and several years after that, I was told that a few of my friends were being baptized in a freezing cold (in winter) backyard pool the next day. Just like that, I wanted to be baptized too. It was never my desire to be re-baptized, but at that moment I just knew I had to do it. It was like I was compelled to. And I honestly resurfaced from that freezing pool a changed person. I am positive that my act of faith enabled God to give me a mighy deliverance. I felt a physical change. It was miraculous!

        But, I still maintain that the Bible is clear that salvation is by grace through faith in Jesus Christ, not by works of any kind, including baptism (Ephesians 2:8-9). So, any interpretation which comes to the conclusion that baptism, or any other act, is necessary for salvation, is a faulty interpretation.


      • I just remembered the story of the conversion of Saul of Tarsus. When Jesus revealed Himself to him, He directed him to the church to learn what he needed to know and baptism was the condition of church membership.

        The point is that if baptism was as inconsequential as you seem to make it out, then Jesus would not have emphasized it in the great commission, and the church would not have bothered with it. It would have died by the wayside the way the practice of foot washing did in the majority of Christian denominations.

        Speaking of foot washing, this is another example whereby cleanliness is next to godliness. At the first communion service we are told that the disciples were still arguing amongst themselves about who should be the greatest. That is until Jesus performed the foot washing service and essentially shut them up, by acting the part of a servant!


  3. I searched for some of those phrases a while back and couldn’t find them, but saw where some of them, they could have possible be paraphrased by bible verses…vw



    Isaiah 35:8
    A highway shall be there, and a road,
    And it shall be called the Highway of Holiness.
    The unclean shall not pass over it,
    But it shall be for others.
    Whoever walks the road, although a fool,
    Shall not go astray.

    We are all on a journey right now. This journey will last for the rest of your life. It is a journey down a long and dangerous highway, one that is filled with potholes, dangerous curves, mixed up signs for directions and dangers from every side.

    Proverbs 16:17
    The highway of the upright is to depart from evil;
    He who keeps his way preserves his soul.

    Proverbs 4:25-27
    Let your eyes look directly forward,
    and your gaze be straight before you.
    26 Keep straight the path of your feet,
    and all your ways will be sure.
    27 Do not swerve to the right or to the left;
    turn your foot away from evil.

    Our eyes must be set on Christ and His way of righteousness and we must never forget that all of the beauty of this present world is going to be destroyed by fire in the end.

    Guard your vision! Guard your heart! Guard your mind! Be careful of the things you hear and see, lest they cause you to leave the Highway of Holiness to be lost in the streets of sin of this present world. Don’t allow sin to become your master. Put your body under subjection and keep your desires upon the things of God.

    Isaiah 62:10-12
    Go through,
    Go through the gates!
    Prepare the way for the people;
    Build up,
    Build up the highway!
    Take out the stones,
    Lift up a banner for the peoples!

    11 Indeed the Lord has proclaimed
    To the end of the world:
    “Say to the daughter of Zion,
    ‘Surely your salvation is coming;
    Behold, His reward is with Him,
    And His work before Him.’”
    12 And they shall call them The Holy People,
    The Redeemed of the Lord;
    And you shall be called Sought Out,
    A City Not Forsaken.

    Just as God told Isaiah to prepare the way of the people for the nation of Israel, God has given that same commission to the leadership of his church.

    The Highway of Holiness often requires traveling by faith in God. The entire walk is a walk of faith. Just like every other Christian that has walked this Highway, you will not see the glory and beauty of your final destination until this life is over and you cross over into the next. Your faith in God’s ability to bring you home and in God’s promises of eternal life must endure until the end.

    Without holiness, no man shall see God. (Hebrews 12:14)

    By James May @ SermonCentral.com (July 2001)


    • God’s people are saved by grace alone, through faith alone in Jesus Christ who made atonement for human sins, but then follows a “second work of grace” which is a personal experience subsequent to regeneration, in which the believer is given the grace to abstain from committing wilful sin if they so desire.


  5. Even the phrase that ‘charity begins at home’ is from the Bible. Consider the parable of the sheep and the goats (Mat. 25) People are either justified or damned in how they respond to Jesus’ brethren. The word “brethren” should have been a clue as to what societal organisation or unit it refers to; namely family. Everyone who uses the word brother, fraternal (latin name of the same), etc. intentionally or unintentionally assumes the type of bonds that are illustrated by brothers and sisters.


    • Now you remind me of HUP.

      “People are either justified or damned in how they respond to Jesus’ brethren” . Say what? Are you saying that we will be damned if we are not nice to Christians; to Davinci even? 😯


      • Seriously though, WHO ARE JESUS’ BRETHREN?

        First of all, few people realize that this verse specifically relates to the end times, the immediate period before the return of the Lord. Let’s not forget that both Matthew 24 and 25 are Jesus’ account of the Great Tribulation, which will climax in His return as King and Judge.

        Who are Yeshua’s brethren? In this context, are they the Jews; in a time when anti-Semitic nations will come against the people of Judah and Jerusalem—that is, the Jews?

        This is one is especially for your attention Dabs,

        Because if your gospel of “….an almost universal detestation of Jews (particularly throughout europe, where it’s been built into the ‘culture’ for centuries)” is true, then I’d say that the world stands condemned:

        Tony Campolo tells a true story of a Jewish boy who suffered under the Nazis in World War II. He was living in a small Polish village when he and all the other Jews of the vicinity were rounded up by Nazi SS troops and sentenced to death. This Jewish boy joined his neighbors in digging a shallow ditch for their graves, and then faced the firing squad with his parents. Sprayed with machine-gun fire, bodies fell into the ditch and the Nazis covered the crumpled bodies with dirt.

        But none of the bullets hit the little boy. He was splattered with the blood of his parents, and when they fell into the ditch, he pretended to be dead and fell on top of them. Several hours later, when darkness fell, he clawed his way out of the grave. With blood and dirt caked on his little body, he made his way to the nearest house and begged for help. Recognizing him as one of the Jewish boys marked for death, he was turned away from house after house as people feared getting into trouble with the SS troops.

        Then something inside this Jewish boy seemed to guide him to say something that was very strange for a Jew to say. When the next family responded to his timid knocking in the still of the night, they heard him cry, “Don’t you recognize me? I am the Jesus you say you love.” After a poignant pause, the woman who stood in the doorway swept him into her arms and kissed him. From that day on, the members of that family loved and cared for that Jewish boy as though he were one of their own.

        “I am the Jesus you say you love.”

        That little Jewish boy was more correct than you might imagine. Matthew 25:40 tells us that one day the Great King and Judge of all the earth will say to people such as that kindhearted Christian lady, “Assuredly, I say to you, inasmuch as you did it to one of the least of these My brethren, you did it to Me.”



      • Matthew 12:47-50

        Someone told him, “Your mother and brothers are standing outside, wanting to speak to you.” He replied to him, “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?” Pointing to his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers. For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.”


      • “Seriously though, WHO ARE JESUS’ BRETHREN?” —>”There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.”
        I think the point is that it’s WHO you are that matters: not WHAT you are.


      • Of course the “world stands condemned” Mon.
        But it’s not down to me; it’s the way your god engineered it.
        Read up on ‘Original Sin’.

        ….and the laws of Nature (physics) also decrees that the actual world itself stands condemned; if not sooner, then in about 5 billion years when Sol (there’s a solid old jewish name!) dies and takes the whole solar-system with it.
        Not down to me though.
        ….bugger! 😆


      • Good thing we’ve introduced sex-education since —>
        ” Pointing to his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers”


      • I think your little story actually makes an unintended point, Mon, because people generally only ever work at confirming their own view-points.

        To take in a little kid BECAUSE he was christian/jew/afghan or wobbelgobber, white/black/green/attractive/ugly or anything, else is EXACTLY the same sort of motivation as turning him away for any of those sorts of reasons.

        Those who don’t indulge in the GBL (the God-Botherers League, which STANDS FOR ‘Competition’ same as does the AFL or any other gang-related activity) would take in a needy kid without a moment’s hesitation nor a single question or explanation.
        Nor even any sense of ‘morality’, however derived.

        Risk or reward wouldn’t even be considered.
        You’d deal with such entirely SEPARATE issues if and when they arose
        …..AS entirely separate issues.

        I’m not being condemnatory here, but the very reason for anyone even telling that story is in praise of ‘christianity’ over other religions or institutions.


      • Monica read the parable of the sheep and the goats again. You will notice that the phrase used is least of these my brethren


      • One of the most common complaints that I have encountered was this:

        “They are more interested in getting you into the church, than keeping you motivated to stay there once you are in.”

        Notice that the group represented in the parable, do things that are designed to bring people to Jesus but once there, people find themselves abandoned in their hour of need by the very people claiming to be their fellow brothers.

        There are many Christian sects where a vast majority of people are treated as mere pew warmers, where you need to be in the “in-group” to be part of church fellowship, where those who could give comfort to the least of these brethren, neglect them.


      • “To take in a little kid BECAUSE he was christian/jew/afghan or wobbelgobber, white/black/green/attractive/ugly or anything, else is EXACTLY the same sort of motivation as turning him away for any of those sorts of reasons.”

        Exactly, Dabs.


      • Yeah Strewth (“Exactly, Dabs.”) ~ and it’s something easily forgotten when we take an inflexible stand….on just about anything.
        I’ve long had the feeling that taking such a position is trying to dress up self-interest to look like altruism.

        I’ve recently had similar issues with people I thought rather more of ~ and have known for decades. Certainly they were ready to give a dog (and in one case a horse) a good home; had been looking for a new dog in fact.
        But…..they didn’t want a little dog/too big a dog/wrong breed/ colour/had to be housetrained/not chase chooks/etc.etc.
        A bit like the way god chooses whom to favour and whom to condemn.
        …….. but still we’re asked to believe god’s not going to ask why we weren’t Einstein or Mother Theresa…..Or christian.

        As the man said: The more I see of people the better I like dogs.


      • Jesus’ brethren are not confined to the Jews but rather everyone that does the will of God, Jew and Gentile alike.

        In the context of the parable these are the Christians (Jew and Gentile alike). The ones that are damned had done exorcisms in Jesus’ name. This cannot be said of the Jews and Judaism who have never recognised Jesus as the Messiah.

        Furthermore, nowhere in the New Testament does it imply that Jesus’ brethren is a phrase applied to the Jews only.

        Your interpretation was an invention of the Council of Trent and the Catholic Counter Reformation. To counter Protestant claims that the book of Revelation was speaking about the abuses found within the Roman Catholic Church, they had to invent an artificial interpretation of Revelation to take the heat off the Catholic Church.

        Amongst the tactics that were used to take the heat off Roman Catholicism was the idea of Dispensationalism whereby God treats the Gentiles one way and the Jews in a different way. This is not supported by the Bible, but is supported if you interpret the Bible according to the traditions of men. And we know very well where Jesus stood on the idea of rejecting the counsel of God in favour of the tradition of men.


  6. ah! I still reckon the bible is the Word of Men… and the sort of men you’d never introduce your friends to…..assuming you have any sane friends. 😉
    Here’s an old favourite of mine ~ a link I haven’t posted in a long time with which some of you will empathise ~ composed by an atheist.
    ….which in a strange way evokes jewish ideas of the ‘afterlife’.


  7. ?? —> “Jesus did not feed only 5000 with the loaves and fish. The Bible says that besides the 5000 men, there were women and children who also ate.”

    Any idea of who counted ’em, or did they just tally up the leftover fish and loaves?

    btw…Can anybody imagine a more ghastly thing to eat than raw fish and unbuttered bread?
    ….and washed down with what?… tepid water?

    Strange tastes you christians have!
    (Makes Trixie’s penchant for catshit look positively wholesome ~ and tasty!)


  8. Incidentally, Trixie (an Aussie-terrier type rescued from a life you couldn’t imagine) might be the ugliest little dog I’ve ever seen; and has a nature among the most delightful and devoted. (typical Aussie breeding)

    Her rehab. since being rescued has worked wonders, and now she needs a good home, and would probably do best with a single person who’s round most of the time. But not you Mon, round though ye be! She’s not evangelical by nature.
    More catholic.
    Like Kate?, I imagine.


    • Are you trying to give me a complex Dabs?

      I’m not a Jew or gay, but am evangelical by nature and a glutton?

      Oh well, no-one’s perfect. At least I’ve never been in jail. 🙂


      • A bit late to worry about all that now, Mon: you’ll just have to try harder in the future! Try to be more like Jesus:-

        Become a jew (which means among other things)
        Be non-evangelical and non-christian
        Be happier, hysterically.
        Eat less (Jesus was skinny) & drink more wine (make your own!)
        Get arrested and thrown in jail. (that’s the easy bit!)

        But I’d prefer it if you didn’t get yourself crucified, so stay away from crucifixes. (Not easy in Malta I guess! Come to Melbourne instead!…go for a walk down the Yarra with Bryan.)

        oh,,,, and btw way:- http://andreasmoser.wordpress.com/2012/04/06/malta-easter-anti-semitism/


      • 😆 Do you know I had a dream about Bryan and Dawn last week, Dabs.

        They owned and ran a very popular and very large restaurant on the Yarra (well, not on it, but beside it). But it was so large that it wasn’t being managed properly. They were losing track of who sat where and who ate what and as a result, people were taking off without paying for their food. I could have done that too, but decided to do the right thing and pay my bill. Dawn was the cashier and when she asked me where I was sitting and what I had eaten, because of the multitude of people, and because I was new to the place, I became disoriented and could not remember where I sat or what the name of my meal was—they had no menus you see. And what did Dawn do— she told me off! 🙂


      • ….as well as crucifixes I’d try, if I were you, to stay well clear of anybody named ‘Freud’ 😉
        Your dream immediately made me think of Aesop telling the story of christianity!
        (…….haven’t worked out the ‘moral’ yet.)


      • I don’t know about Freud, but Jung might say that restaurant is like a state of mind you like to be in, with lots of thoughts on the menu. A state of mind that could do with better management, because the aspect of yourself (an aspect that somehow reminds you of Dawn) that is responsible for that state isn’t getting full worth out of it, putting in more than you get out.

        You (the conscious part of your mind) is trying honestly to do the right thing, put in your fair share. But where are you sitting? What have you absorbed? Without accurate labels it’s easy to become disorientated.

        So that part of you, who bears a resemblance to Dawn, thinks it’s all your own fault for not doing better.

        But it’s not, it’s just the way your sub conscious judges yourself.

        Then again, I could be quite wrong, and it’s just an odd dream!


      • Politics is the last thing I’d want to be associated with. Jim Cairns regretted trying to change anything by going that road – he said he should have gone into media. Now with social media we can each have a bit to contribute.:lol:


      • LOL, and I just thought it was a crazy dream.

        Hope Dawn loved it Bryan….and I’m still laughing about it. BTW, it wasn’t personal because Dawn didn’t recognise me. She was just flustered. And I had just one glimpse of you in the dream Bryan. You were rushing around like a blue-arsed fly! 😉


    • I wouldn’t take on a dog cos I wouldn’t be able to keep it when I move to the unit.

      If I did, I’d love an English bulldog. I fell in love when I saw this clip of one riding a skate board. Kooky dogs.


      • I wouldn’t push a dog on someone who didn’t want one, Kathleen; but there are lotsa older unit-dwellers around here who have one (or a cat-or-two, and one even has a white rat). They’d be lost without them ~ and their pets create all sorts of socially/emotionally-useful networks both inside and outside of the ‘Oldie’ community.
        One old local dear who hadn’t left her unit in several years is now walking her dog every day. A bulldog, no less.
        Worth considering


      • Or what I could do is why my niece used to do – and drag her huge soft toy dog on a leash to school lol


  9. Sorry Bryan,

    “Fire in my bones” 😆

    That’s it from me, I have work to do. I’m about to head off to Malta, meeting up with all my family from Sydney over there, including my old Mum! It’s been 38 years since I was last there, and that time I met up with my Nanna. So can’t wait.

    And guess what? Yep, I am pregnant! No, just kidding. But I am going to be a Nanna again—YAAY! Three babies under 4 to look after—God help me!

    See ya!


    • ‘See ya’ in a couple of months, Mon my love. Hope it’s a great excursion for you. and also congrats on the coming arrival.

      Rian and pusses


      • Thanks Rian.

        Please give Michael and big hug and kiss for me when you see him…..and Bryan, Strewth and Kathleen too if they come. Have a great get-together and I’ll be thinking of you.


        Mon xxoo


      • Thanks Kathleen.

        I would have loved for you to come along too, so I’ll certainly be thinking of you when I’m over there, especially when I am checking out the Maltese lace. About your ex-friend who had it in for Italians, well did you know that our (Maltese) DNA is overwhelmingly Sicilian and Italian? I thought we were a bit of this and a bit of that, but apparently not.

        Btw, it’s three grand-babies (all under 4 years of age) I’ll be having…..or do you know something I don’t? 😉

        Give Dabs heaps while I’m away.


      • I wonder what you’ll think of the changes (apparently quite a lot since you would have been there). I actually only recently found out about the mainly Sicilian thing. Not surprised as they’re only a hop, skip and jump away.

        Have a great time and I will give Dabbles a hard time. It’s part of my DNA.


      • Gee I recall when they used to ask ‘How do you make a Maltese Cross?’ Always assumed that you needed to kick him in the shins.
        Ah well,

        Oh yes, and how do you make a Venetian Blind? –
        Poke him in the eyes, I guess


  10. Again feminists trying to impose the Sisterhood’s (descriptive word that!) claim to ‘partnership’ in the world of men!!

    Who’s that blonde in the photo above trying to muscle in on Isaac Newton’s grand moment in the realisation of the existence of gravity?? 🙂


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