QUIZMANIA (BRITISH ITV)
Greg Scott: We’re looking for an occupation beginning with ‘T’. Contestant: Doctor. Scott: No, it’s ‘T’. ‘T’ for Tommy. ‘T’ for Tango. Contestant: Oh, right . . . (pause) … . . Doctor.
UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE Bamber Gascoigne: What was Gandhi’s first name? Contestant: Goosey?
DANNY KELLY SHOW (RADIO WM)
Kelly: Which French Mediterranean town hosts a famous film festival every year? Contestant: I don’t know, I need a clue. Kelly: OK. What do beans come in? Contestant: Cartons?
BEG, BORROW OR STEAL (BBC2)
Jamie Theakston: Where do you think Cambridge University is? Contestant: Geography isn’t my strong point. Theakston: There’s a clue in the title. Contestant: Leicester.
BBC NORFOLK Stewart White: Who had a worldwide hit with What A Wonderful World? Contestant: I don’t know. White: I’ll give you some clues: what do you call the part between your hand and your elbow? Contestant: Arm. White: Correct. And if you’re not weak, you’re … . .? Contestant: Strong. White: Correct – and what was Lord Mountbatten’s first name? Contestant: Louis. White: Well, there we are then. So who had a worldwide hit with the song What A Wonderful World? Contestant: Frank Sinatra?
LATE SHOW (BBC MIDLANDS)
Alex Trelinski: What is the capital of Italy? Contestant: France. Trelinski: France is another country. Try again. Contestant: Oh, um, Benidorm. Trelinski: Wrong, sorry, let’s try another question. In which country is the Parthenon? Contestant: Sorry, I don’t know. Trelinski: Just guess a country then. Contestant: Paris.
UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)
Jeremy Paxman: What is another name for ‘cherrypickers’ and ‘cheesemongers’? Contestant: Homosexuals. Paxman: No. They’re regiments in the British Army who will be very upset with you.
THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)
Anne Robinson: Oscar Wilde, Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer have all written books about their experiences in what: prison, or the Conservative Party? Contestant: The Conservative Party.
BEACON RADIO (WOLVERHAMPTON)
DJ Mark: For Pounds 10, what is the nationality of the Pope? Ruth from Rowley Regis: I think I know that one. Is it Jewish?
THE WEAKEST LINK Anne Robinson: In traffic, what ‘J’ is where two roads meet? Contestant: Jool carriageway?
GWR FM (Bristol)
Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22, 1963? Contestant: I don’t know, I wasn’t watching it then.
RTE RADIO 2FM (IRELAND)
Presenter: What is the name of the long- running TV comedy show about pensioners: Last Of The …? Caller: Mohicans.
QUIZMANIA Greg Scott: We’re looking for a word that goes in front of ‘clock’. Contestant: Grandfather. Scott: Grandfather clock is already up there, say something else. Contestant: Panda.
PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC RADIO MANCHESTER)
Phil: What’s 11 squared? Contestant: I don’t know. Phil: I’ll give you a clue. It’s two ones with a two in the middle. Contestant: Is it five?
RICHARD AND JUDY Q: Which American actor is married to Nicole Kidman? A: Forrest Gump.
RICHARD AND JUDY Leslie: On which street did Sherlock Holmes live? Contestant: Er . . . Leslie: He makes bread .. . Contestant: Er . . . Leslie: He makes cakes .. . Contestant: Kipling Street?
MAGIC 52 (NORTHEAST ENGLAND)
Presenter: In what year was President Kennedy assassinated? Contestant: Erm .. . Presenter: Well, let’s put it this way – he didn’t see 1964. Contestant: 1965?
SIMPLY THE BEST (ITV)
Phil Tufnell: How many Olympic Games have been held? Contestant: Six. Tufnell: Higher! Contestant: Five.
FORT BOYARD (CHALLENGE TV)
Jodie Marsh: Arrange these two groups of letters to form a word – CHED and PIT. Team: Chedpit.
LINCS FM PHONE-IN Presenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world? Contestant: Barcelona. Presenter: I was really after the name of a country. Contestant: I’m sorry, I don’t know the names of any countries in Spain.
RADIO 1 EARLY MORNING SHOW Presenter: How many toes would three people have in total? Contestant: 23.
NOTTS AND CROSSES QUIZ (BBC RADIO NOTTINGHAM) Jeff Owen: In which country is Mount Everest? Contestant (long pause): Er, it’s not in Scotland, is it?
THE MICK GIRDLER SHOW (BBC RADIO SOLENT)
Girdler: I’m looking for an island in the Atlantic whose name includes the letter ‘e’. Contestant: Ghana. Girdler: No, listen. It’s an island in the Atlantic Ocean. Contestant: New Zealand.
NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)
Question: What is the world’s largest continent? Contestant: The Pacific
ROCK FM (PRESTON)
Presenter: Name a film starring Bob Hoskins that is also the name of a famous painting by Leonardo Da Vinci. Contestant: Who Framed Roger Rabbit?
(And more below)